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The girl next door……

12 Jan

Oh the memorys.  He was there for my first real sexual experience with a girl.  Well kinda, here’s the story……

We were barbecuing at our little apartment.  We must have been about 24 then.  One of our single buddies was there and when my fiancé saw to nice looking girls walk by he invited them in for a drink and some barbeque.  Both had long hair but the tall one had these beautiful full lips and piercing blue eyes.  They hung out and drank.  We tried to get our friend to chat them up but he proved again why he is single and did a poor job.  The tall one was our new neighbor in the complex.

We became friends going on outings to the river together, out to partes, she would hang with us at our apartment.  One night we were drinking and sitting together on our couch.  She started brushing my hair and telling me how beautiful I was.  I complimented her back.  Her breath on my neck was exciting my heart was racing.  I was aroused by her soft touch.  We were both quite tipsy and she said she wanted to go back to her apartment.  We left together and I don’t know what I told my fiancé but we left him alone.

When we got there we sat on the couch and started making out right away.  Her lips were dreamy.  My hands in her hair, on her breasts.  She was pulling off her shirt and pulling off mine.  Her pale puffy nipples felt so soft in my mouth.  I felt a little lost when she sucked on my breasts, what do I do with my hands?  I closed my eyes and stroked her hair.  We went back to kissing our bare breasts pressed together as we wiggled out of our pants.  Exploring her wet pussy with a finger as we kissed and she squeezed my tits.

She backed away and looked at me.  I told her how beautiful she was before she went down on me and started to lick my pussy.  I was eager to taste her as well.  She playfully tickled me with her tongue and entered me with her fingers.  Her touch was thrilling. 

After enjoying her attention for a while I had her lay back on the couch and kissed her deeply.   I gave her a gentile bite on the neck and her breasts.  Kissing her soft stomach before getting to what I’d been eagerly awaiting.  I lick her and taste her sweet wetness.  I can feel her squirm and I rub little circles with my tongue on her clit.  Kissing and sucking as she moans.  I try adding my hands and awkwardly gently I slip one inside of her a little at a time. 

We ended up kissing some more our naked bodies pressed together.  She was rubbing her pussy on my leg.  It was the first time for both of us but there was a level of comfort that let us fumble a bit without being uncomfortable.  We were so caught up in each other we didn’t seem to notice the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs.  When the door opened my fiancé looked ready to party.  We probably looked like a couple of deer in headlights. 

It was sad to say she was not into being with him at that time.  That was as far as we got.  For a long time he would tease me that he was upset.  Many years down the road he finally got his turn but that is another story.  It is a hot memory that we share.  That summer the song “It Wasn’t Me” by Shaggy was on heavy rotation on every station.  Not my normal type of music but the lyrics always made us laugh. 

 Here’s the part:

Honey came in and she caught me red-handed
Creeping with the girl next door

Saw me bangin’ on the sofa (It wasn’t me)

Here’s the video for “It Wasn’t Me”

Music and mayhem….

9 Nov

Whoo hoo!  Had a great time last night.  Went and saw a show and a new local venue.  I made an executive decision to spend $20 bucks and have some fun!  The Koffin Kats played with some other awesome bands at warehouse that just started having shows about two months ago.  The crowd was mostly younger Punks with a handful of Rockabilly types.  I was good and stayed out of the pit.  My fiancé came, I’ve been telling him about this venue.  They’ve had some no name hardcore bands come through. I’ve been trying to get him to go (since I couldn’t go) and he always seemed put off by the no name bands at a new venue in a bad neighborhood. 

We met a few of the folks that run the joint and chatted with the crowd.  My mind kept coming back to Tom.  I’m thinking he would love the place and the crowd.  When I told him about the show I mentioned the 2nd band who I was not familiar with and he knew them right away.  The place was covered in graffiti and had a nice upstairs loungy area with an interesting selection of books.  It was BYOB making it a very cost-effective night! 

I hope I can go to more shows there and make some new friends.  The crew we hang out with is cool but they don’t fit with my interests.  They prefer Techno to Hard Core.  Louis Vuittan to Lucky 13.  Acra to Chevy.  Don’t get me wrong there is a bunch of other stuff we connect on but I’d love to find some folks that match a bit better with my tastes. 

Riding Dirty…..

17 Oct

I had mentioned earlier how I feel like I don’t fit in at work conferences. Well of course I fit right in.  I had a great time.  Class went very well.  The food was good.  I closed the bar down every night and was up early and bright eyed for class.  One night 5 of us went out to a sports bar after class and drank.  We had been joking arround about signing karaoke then lo and behold it was karaoke night at the bar.  The other girl kept talking about singing I offered to go with her.  When it was clear she was not in to do it I had to make it happen.  Too much lip service to something that doesn’t get done drives me crazy.  Since they didn’t have any Pantera I chose Black Sabbath “War Pigs”.  I had a great time screaming out the song.  My group gave me a great applause.  Even though I throughly butchered the song I felt good because I made it happen.  We rode dirty back to the hotel.  I say that because the sweet little thing from a midwest branch was bumping some of the nastiest rap I’ve ever heard.  There were four of us in the back (one guy laying across all of our laps) and a big fella and the sweet little thing on his lap in the front.  She played the classic song “Gin and Juice” by Snoop Dog and we all sang along.  It was a great night. 

On the flip side the contact with my fiancé started decline with each conversation.  He was stressed out.  The boys were trying his patience and his body was bothering him.  Saying things to me like have a good time, sarcastically.  Telling my I shouldn’t go out, that I’m a sloppy drunk.  That men and women are held to different standards.  By Wednesday he was calling me names and just being mean.  Strangely perfect timing.  I hung up on him and texted back my own nastiness.  I used his poor demeanor for the reason why I was not in contact other than to tell the boys good night and that I love them.  I know it all seems so horrible but it worked.  Plus if you can count on someone to be mean to you what is really going on anyway?

Pinned up and pinned down….

18 Sep

Today I’m hung over.  Not too badly but it’s not something I’ve dealt with for a long while.  I am working today. It’s easier to work hangover than be at home with the boys.  My fiancé and I went out to a party.  It was a Pin Up party.  All the girls had their hair curled with flowers or bandanas on.  Cute old-school dresses and lots of polka dots.  I started drinking at the house so I wouldn’t have to drive.  I rarely get out so why should I have to be the DD?  Everyone was happy to see me.  The music was horrible but after a while it was easy to drown out.  We had champagne, rum, vodka and whiskey.  Bong rips and key bumps.  I was pretty fucked up having a great time mingling with everyone when I noticed it was 2:30am.  We needed to get home!  I don’t remember the ride home.  I know from my fiancé that my Dad was kinda mad at us for having him stay late watching the kids.  

After he left my fiancé and I started fooling arround.  My memory fades in an out but I do remember him fucking me hard standing while I kneeled at the edge of the bed.  I let him rub my ass with his cock.  He started to push in and it felt good so I let him.  I turned over on my back and spread my legs showing off my pussy as he fucked my ass.  I guided his hand and had him finger me as he came in me.  As he was getting off he was moaning with pleasure.  With him finishing I knew I could give in and enjoy a great orgasm.  The next morning I surveyed the damage.  Cloths all over the living room.  Pizza over our head-board.  Sheets a mess and my butt feels funny.  I just wish I could remember more.

I want to be there so bad……

2 Sep

I’m just venting.  My love is going to a weekend festival of sorts.  Lots of punk and hard rock bands.  Camping drinking and general lawlessness.  He is bringing his three-wheeler, his shot-gun and a bunch of beer.  There will be lots of smoking (of which he does not partake) and drug use.  Basically a crazy weekend party/camp out with bands.  Oh how I want to shrug of my responsibilities and party with him.  He says he would love to have me there with him.  I tell him go have fun, I won’t expect to hear from him untill Tuesday.  He says he will be texting me if he has signal and if he gets any pictures of boobs he will send them to me.  I love how we interact.  We would have so much fun together.  I hate the reality that I will probably never get to be with him like that.  At least not untill I’m pushing 40 and he’s almost 50 (I’m 32 and he’s 41) and yes we are still acting like kids.  Just one more reason why I love him so.  I hate to think by the time I get my hands on him for good he’ll be to broken down to enjoy sleeping on the ground and partying all night.  I don’t plan on giving those things up (of course only on occasional basis).  As he parties the holiday weekend away I’ll be working.  He does have to work too so I expect to talk to him maybe even video chat when he is in town for work.  He’s going to spend tonight out there and go back out the next day for another night.  I hate to say it but I hope he can’t stop thinking of me while he watches all those other chicks party.

Rambeling about myself…..

14 Aug

In a nut shell my situation is this.  I’m with my fiancé who I’ve been together with for 15 years now.  We have been together since high school.  We have two kids under the age of 5, two dogs, a house and two cars.  Kinda like the American dream right?  Well that’s the short version.  I feel the need to give the long version now. 

We are both high school drop-outs.  I some have a great job even though I’m quite the fuck up.  I’ve smoked weed well over half of my time on this earth.  I got my job at before they started drug testing.  I enjoy using a variety of tamer drugs for recreation when the time is right.  Before my kids I used to trip about once a month.  Do E about every so often and do blow well probably 4-5 nights a week.  Don’t even ask about the drinking.  Even with all this I always showed up to work and performed.  I have a grow room all my own.  When it’s working I stay up late caring for my ladies and playing chemist with all the supplements that a hydro system needs.  I listen to metal, psychobilly, reggae and rock.  I’m just starting to get into punk.  I love to go to shows and even though I’m too old for this shit I love to bounce around in a mosh pit.  Now instead of a Slayer pit I stick to the more tame ones.  Even though I have two little kids I still like to have a good time, but I will not let my wants get in the way of caring for them and protecting them.  I have scaled back my partying a ton.  In fact now it’s probably 2 – 3 nights a year that I get crazy and that’s only when the kids are safely staying with a family member.  I’m learning how to live a “normal” life.  My co-workers mostly don’t know about my tendency to party.  They for sure don’t know I’m bi.  I feel like I have to keep so much of my self separate from parts of my life.  My work has social events some times you bring your spouse.  I have trouble bringing my fiancé because of all the stuff he cannot talk about.  Plus with no career or job he kinda doesn’t fit in.  I think sometimes like I’m an undercover freak.

Now I’ve got a new secret in my life Tom.  He doesn’t do drugs or smoke.  He has a job.  He was in the military for 10 years.  He does like to go to shows and he loves me.  I think he is the closest to a normal person who loves me ever.  I broke up with my fiancé once and I started dating a chef who was also a large-scale grower close to normal but not so much.  He had 10lbs of weed in his back room and half a pound of psychedelic mushrooms and the underside of his deck was double grow room.  Now I have a guy who is interested in me that would match up with how normal my life has become.  I could take him with me to the normal events and I wouldn’t have to remind him of what not to talk about.  I’ve told him about as much of my life as he would listen too.  I’d feel comfortable telling him anything he wants to know.  He says he’d be OK if I still chose to do drugs for fun.  He’s OK with me liking women ( guess what guy wouldn’t be).  He even said he would be OK letting me fuck another guy if it made me happy.  I love the way I feel when I’m talking to him.  When I’m with him.  He lives 700 miles from me.  He is married, they have a house, two dogs and two cars and a person they take care of.  We’ve only been in the same place a total of 6 days.  3 of those days were only a few hours.  I am so drawn to him.  When we talk about sex I’m so turned on by him.  When we talk about everyday stuff I want to be there.  When we talk about meeting I’m ready to run to him.  Still I don’t know where this will lead.  My heart is getting way to wrapped up in this and I’m starting to lose it.  My life was already complicated but now it’s dizzying. 

Some times I wonder why don’t I just say good-bye to both of them.  One doesn’t help me much and sometimes drags me down.  The other is, well, unavailable.  Then I think who would know me and love me.  I need a decent person to be with me and my kids and what decent person would like me with my crazy ways.  Maybe I’m over thinking this but it keeps coming back arround in my head.  I think I’ll do what I’ve always done.  Look forward, work hard and keep being me.

Ball game and a show……

12 Aug

I had the most fun I had in a long time about a month ago.  My work had gotten a luxury box for a base-ball game.  Free beer and brats!  Had some good company and didn’t have to drive.  The game was over way quick.  I got a good buzz going and we stopped at the local tavern when we got back to the town where my boss lives.  Had some great fries and some Lucky 13 from Lagunitas. 

I was early for my next adventure so I took a few minutes in the restroom to change into to a sexy sleeveless top and took my makeup up a notch for the show!  I was going to see the Reverend with the Swinging Utters!  While waiting for my fiancé to meet me I layed down in the grass in a park with a great view.  I had a video call with Tom.  I wished I was going to the show with him but with 700 miles between us it’s hard to get a date.  So my fiancé, our friend and I went out to dinner.  The place we went had great salsa.  I ordered a crab tostada.  The crab was horrible.  I tried their burritos also bad.  I had almost no dinner due to the poor quality of food.  Plus my stomach was touch due to all the beer and ball park junk food.  I was texting with Tom and he asked how much do you want to kiss me.  I said more than I want to smoke a joint.  I asked him the same question, he replied with the same answer.  I teased him saying you don’t smoke I’m offended.  Then my phone died.  I felt bad that I left him hanging but I could not ask my fiancé for his phone to text my lover now could I?  We ran into a friend who runs a tattoo shop down the way from the concert hall and smoked a joint with him.  It sure helped my tummy.  Now I’m feeling great! 

We got into the show and we were early.  I got my first Sailor and 7 for the night and we hung out and watched the crowd.  The opening band was great.  I had never seen the before and was so glad that I did.  The pit was small.  There was very tall guy with a huge mohawk in the pit the whole time, even soloing it at times.  I was being my self yelling my approval to the band bouncing around ready to run into the pit but I didn’t.  I was pretty drunk when they started to set up for the Reverend.  We saw a few friends and said our hello and they went back up to the front where we couldn’t go.  My fiancé had a surgery about 7 months ago and still didn’t do well with crowds.  He wanted me to hang with him so we were on the floor but against a wall off to the side.  When the Reverend came on I was drunk.  The pit was heating up and the band sounded great.   I wore flip-flops to the show because I knew my fiancé would not want me in the pit without him being to go in if he felt the need.  I kept taking off my shoes and starting to go.  He’s holding me back by my belt loops.  I give up at times and just dance with my back to him.  I feel him pulling at me here and there but I’m thinking he’s just trying to keep me from taking off for the front of the stage or the pit.  After the show I’m drunk and kinda pissy he wouldn’t let me play.  We had a friend that had said he could get us back stage but my fiancé didn’t even call him.  I was kinda disappointed about that. 

We went back to my friend’s house and had a beer in the hot tub and smoked another doobie.  I fell asleep in the car on the way home and when I got home I laughed my ass all the way into the house and to bed.  It was a great time.  I kept thinking I might have had more fun with Tom.  The next day I told Tom about the show.  He teased me that I forgot about him.  His response to how much he wanted to kiss me was more than he wanted to breath.  How sweet, he is always so sweet.  He said he would have let me play in the pit and go up to the front of the stage.  He knows one of the techs for the band he said he would have gotten us backstage to meet the Reverend and Jimbo (I always forget the drummers name).  I guess it’s easy to think it would be better if someone else was there but for some reason I really believe it.  I hope one day I’ll be able to see for real.  We said next time the Reverend tours we will go together.  I guess I will just have to wait and see.