Timing is everything….

5 Jul

I have a window of time that calls to me, taunts me, the possibility drives me crazy.  Tom has an empty house at the end of this month and has invited me to join him.  I want it more that I can describe.  To be with him in the morning.  Cooking together, sitting together on the patio, seeing where he lives and snuggling at night.  Maybe even going out on his boat.  Since our AFF profile is in his town we’d even have a chance at a few dates.  So much to want and look forward to, if I can just make it there.

The situation with Dick (we’re calling my ex Dick now) has me frozen.  I worry that I might need to take a week off to get my child care situation in order if he blows out with out notice.  He gets so mad when I leave town.  Lying to him again to have free time to spend with my love makes me feel so guilty. 

If I can make this trip it might also help us see each other in a more realistic light.  No hotels, no far away places.  A house in a neighborhood, him going to work, us working together in the kitchen.  Maybe I’ll even mow his lawn…topless and in heels….kidding only kidding. 

I hope this daydream can become real.  I’ve got a few weeks to get up the courage to put the pieces I need together to leave.  I’m just having trouble picking another lie.  Facing the uncertainty.  Times ticking and I’m just out in the breeze unable to pick a direction.

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2 Responses to “Timing is everything….”

  1. The Hook July 10, 2012 at 9:07 am #

    Let’s hope Fate is on your side… for once!

    • terriblytorn13 August 5, 2012 at 5:34 pm #

      This is a late reply but by now fate has kicked in and gotten the ball rolling for me. Now I just gotta ride the bitch out.

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