Getting soft….

11 Jan

When you’ve been with someone for almost half of you’re life it’s hard to picture life without them.  Someone knows me so well, who knows my whole family.  They have fond memories of my Grandparents who’ve passed.  We’re bonded in a way that very few people are.  Though right now we’re in a very bad place. However I still think I need to try to salvage the investments we’ve made in each other and of course for the sake of keeping the children in one harmonious household.

Why this sudden change you may ask?  It’s not just that he cleaned the bathrooms, vacuumed, organized the kids rooms, swept and had dinner on the stove when I came home and then didn’t ask me to suck his cock for a reward….but it helped.  The longing looks, the tender hugs, nice notes on Facebook that I’m the best and the light of his life.  He’s been very nice and apologetic.  He’s starting to talk about how a clean organized home makes him more comfortable. He’s going to doctor after doctor trying to find out the root of the problems that have him unable to function well.  I see somethings that might signal that he is willing to try to make things better.

Maybe the canceling of my solo appointment is for a reason.  That reason being that I should start couples counseling to see if we can work it out together.  I think I can talk about my issues without taking about the affair.  Since my lover is 700 miles away and we’ve only physically been together three times it’s not as deep a problem as it would be if I was fucking him twice a week.

I don’t know what the right answer is but I guess I need to work on where I’m at first before trying to move to something else further dammaging my current situation.  The writing has been good for my soul so I will contiue to blather on about what ever comes to mind and am still open for comments, sugestions or anything you think should be said.  Maybe I’ll take you on a trip or two down memory lane.  Thanks for listening.


10 Responses to “Getting soft….”

  1. f#@*knows January 11, 2012 at 1:41 pm #

    i hope it works for you!

    • terriblytorn13 January 11, 2012 at 2:48 pm #

      Thank you my friend. I hope things move smoothly as possible for you. I still haven’t gotten that book to work. I’ll keep messing with it.

  2. sexuallifeofawife January 11, 2012 at 1:48 pm #

    If he’s really making an effort – then I think it may still be worth your hanging in there…
    I know most people will have a picture of him being an all round loser – but as you said yourself you do have these bonds…
    If you’re not sure what you should be doing and you are not happy than therapy could be a real help. If its for couples then the therapist can be objective about what is happening for both of you – so you get to hear each other abit more…
    One on one therapy could still be useful for yourself though…

    • terriblytorn13 January 11, 2012 at 3:39 pm #

      Thank you for your imput.

      There has been a real change in the last week or so with his efforts around the house and attention to our finances. He recently has been less mean and more thoughtful.

      I think talking to someone is going to be the key. Now I just need to find out who and when and how much!

  3. B January 11, 2012 at 2:11 pm #

    I think it’s worth a chance to try and resolve the underlying issues. Be open about the things that bother you, but hear him out as well. I think first getting out all of your frustrations will be good for the both of you.

    • terriblytorn13 January 11, 2012 at 3:45 pm #

      Good advice, I will try. I harbor a lot of resentment that he has me carry the weight and doesn’t seem to think it should matter. He seems to be turning a new leaf so maybe it’s something that can be worked on together.

  4. confessionsofyourhusbandsmistress January 12, 2012 at 2:02 pm #

    I agree with all. Good for you for seeing the investment and making an effort towards improvement. I would still suggest individual therapy though because there are things that you’ll discover you want to work on on your own.

    • terriblytorn13 January 12, 2012 at 4:22 pm #

      I just got the good news they made an new appointment for my own personal therapy. Now I need to see about going in as a couple. Thank you for listening to me whine and rant and then backing up my leaning towards trying to work it out.

  5. The Hook January 14, 2012 at 9:57 am #

    Thanks for writing! Good luck in the future. I hope he keeps improving.

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