I want it to be better it’s just…..

18 Nov

Last night I got some things out.  I never got to be constructive.  My fiancé keeps trying to get intimate.  I am starting to hug and kiss him a little easier.  When he goes to grab my boobs or my ass I draw back and get stiff.  He asked me why and I told him I just don’t feel that way about him right now.  This starts a fight.  He starts being mean and calling me names.  My response is if you would like me to desire you maybe you shouldn’t treat me like shit.

We start to go rounds about the housework.  He does very little and he says it’s because he takes care of the kids.  I tell him I don’t think it’s enough.  I let him know that if it’s the pain in his knee that is one thing but if he is not apologetic that he is not able to do more then how can I feel sympathy.  Frankly he is a dick about it.  He bitches that I don’t do enough.  Admittedly I don’t always do as much as I should either being tired or crapped out makes me want to sit on my butt and just zone out or sleep. 

As all of our arguments go we sat down and watched It’s Always Sunny in the same room.  We laughed together at some of their bits.  I think we started fighting again after the show.  I remember going to bed without saying goodnight again.  Sleeping next to the big wall of blankets and pillows that separates us.


2 Responses to “I want it to be better it’s just…..”

  1. The Hook November 18, 2011 at 1:43 pm #

    “I remember going to bed without saying goodnight again. Sleeping next to the big wall of blankets and pillows that separates us.”
    Unfortunately, that’s not all that separates you.
    You have to make a decision soon, before the emotional damage becomes too great.

    • terriblytorn13 November 19, 2011 at 8:19 am #

      I’m feeling that point creeping up. Thanks for your comment Hook.

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